It has been silent here for a while, reason is that I am going through a very rough time at the moment. I got infected with Lyme disease, more precisely neuroborreliosis. I developed very scary symptoms like not being able to walk properly, constant strong nausea, fever attacks, heavy fatigue, impaired vision, breathing difficulties, concentration issues, muscle failure in arms and legs to the point where things just drop uncontrolled out of my hands or my knees just give in and other neurological problems. For over a month now I am hardly able to leave the bed. The amount of symptoms made me go through my own personal hell. And I could not distract myself with reading or anything I would normally do when I am sick. It was just not possible. Since a few days it feels a little lighter and I'm able to feel hope again. No one can tell me how long it will take to fully recover or if there will be permanent impairments, but I will do my best to regain quality of life. After 32 days in bed I can say, I really miss nature walks so much! And I had a big fear that I won't be able to paint anymore. We take so many things for granted most of the time. The ability to see, hear and walk. The amount of suffering made me know one thing for sure: I won't ever be the same person again. But the fact that I am able to write about it here, tells me that I have the worst behind me.
Take care + until soon!
☙
2 comments:
Wishing you all the strength
and all the rest you need,
dear Claudia.
Please allow yourself the time
to recover
and don't force
as it makes symptoms worse.
Listen carefully to your body:
that's all you can really do,
apart from trying to accept
which isn't always that easy ...
I hope that you are surrounded by love
and good care
and that you'll soon be able
to get some fresh air
outside,
even if it's just to sit on a blanket
and watch the natural world around you.
x
Dear Elke! Thank you for your kind words! Yes, you are right, it is not possible to force anything! I feel and experience that clearly. It will be a long way.
Much love!!!! Claudia
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