*End of August

August ist coming to an end already.

It feels like a lost summer to me,

because of my health circumstances.

But the last week brought further improvements

and finally my vital spirits are coming back.

I feel motivated to do so many things,

but my body is lagging behind

and I have to be careful where I use my energy.

It feels like getting out of a long torture.

Surreal and deeply marked.

☙

*in the Styrian mountains

The light was beautiful in the forests of the Styrian mountains in June. The bellflowers were dancing between the shiny grasses in the wind. Oh, how good that we are not able to look into the future!

I'm still doing my best to recover from neuroborreliosis. On the weekend I made my first little nature walk. I cried out of gratitude. I am able to be up in the mornings now, but from midday on I have to be mostly in bed again. Little steps on a long road as it seems.

☙

*End of June

{Music: Huma-Huma – Pachabelly}

I haven't posted my "End of June" movie yet here.

We have been on a little trip to the Styrian mountains. 

Weather was unbelievable hot, I did not film a lot.

Right now I can only dream of making nature walks.

I tried twice, but it's not possible yet. 

I hope you are able to enjoy summer though!

☙

*garden in June

Some garden pictures from June, before the hail came.

Usually when I grow carrots or parsnips I never get seeds, but I would like to be able to buy as few seeds as possible to sustain our vegetable garden, so I tried something. I did not harvest all carrots and parsnips last year and just let them grow further and it worked, they developed many seeds! This year I will do the same, so I can get more seeds next year. It's a lovely cycle! 

☙

*some words

It has been silent here for a while, reason is that I am going through a very rough time at the moment. I got infected with Lyme disease, more precisely neuroborreliosis. I developed very scary symptoms like not being able to walk properly, constant strong nausea, fever attacks, heavy fatigue, impaired vision, breathing difficulties, concentration issues, muscle failure in arms and legs to the point where things just drop uncontrolled out of my hands or my knees just give in and other neurological problems. For over a month now I am hardly able to leave the bed. The amount of symptoms made me go through my own personal hell. And I could not distract myself with reading or anything I would normally do when I am sick. It was just not possible. Since a few days it feels a little lighter and I'm able to feel hope again. No one can tell me how long it will take to fully recover or if there will be permanent impairments, but I will do my best to regain quality of life. After 32 days in bed I can say, I really miss nature walks so much! And I had a big fear that I won't be able to paint anymore. We take so many things for granted most of the time. The ability to see, hear and walk. The amount of suffering made me know one thing for sure: I won't ever be the same person again. But the fact that I am able to write about it here, tells me that I have the worst behind me. 

Take care + until soon!

☙